Behind The Black Curtain

by My Terminal And The Trip

Behind The Black Curtain cover art
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about

fully written, produced, performed, mixed and mastered by carlo baldini at home mostly from june to november 2011.
small parts were recorded sometime between 2009 & 2011.
Some rights reserved 2011 Marylebone Records

www.myterminalandthetrip.com
www.facebook.com/myterminalandthetrip
www.twitter.com/myterminaltrip

credits

released 14 November 2011

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about

Darkwave/electronic bedroom music.
No budget. Free stuff.

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Track Name: Depths
wind blows on my balcony
I can't remember who I am
every time I step into this
I happen to fall apart
torn inside I think of your face
destiny loves to play me
begging me to change something
but something's something never clear

but you wake up my mind
or you are supposed to
come inside and tear me down
now

cos I see you in depths of
minds which always seem to set me free
and take me away
I see you in depths of
your bright light that tries to come out
and take me away

carrying the weight of my choices
I can't forget what I have done
and I don't seem to learn a lesson
how d'you think you'll be able to?
love isn't something I can
embrace and make mine
I don't feel anything at all
cos my life's something never clear

and you wanna wake my mind
or you think you are to
you will just tear me down
here

I see you in those depths
come another day if you want to
set me free
Track Name: Emily
“I held a jewel in my fingers and went to sleep”

you don't know what I am hiding within
for some reason
it will be kept as a secret
don't you claim to be the one who'll know

and in my circles of faith
I'll see your enemies
their hands towards my wishes
but your poetry will stay beside me

I'll hold anything but what's not mine
in my fingers
my jewels not as they may believe
yeah the common belief
I'm told by whoever who wishes me gone
as they want me
Emily I'll think about your wisdom
when I am gone

and in my circles of faith
I'll see your enemies
their hands towards my wishes
but your poetry will stay beside me

“forever is composed by nows”

they care of what's not going well for you
this whiplash got me stuck in here
so I will see you

you don't know what I am hiding within
for some reason
Emily I'll think about your wisdom
when I am gone

and in my circles of faith
I'll see you Emily
bare hands towards my wishes
and your poetry will stay beside me
Track Name: American Gothic
you're taking away and getting your grind
you're taking your drugs to fall apart
it’s not the same that our fathers had done
I let your drugs to shake my blood
no one can see these things
but all of this you got is for the American Gothic

strange things
I can’t take it all away
strange land
where no one knows what is there
waste me
I’ve become addict but can’t realise
that all we do and got is for the American Gothic

and it all wants to make my day

you flush it all and I pick up
you don’t care about me nor what I got
I don’t even hurt myself twisting knives
should I walk alone or walk the line
am I anyone in a single queue
all of this we got is what everyone sees about it

and I’m feeling, I’m chasing, I’m taking
but I can’t always reach anything
so I’m breaking down, and waiting here, I’m waiting dear
but neither this seems to make my day
Track Name: Real Love
waiting for the end of the world as we know it
I'll hold all the lies by my side for you
and I really want this to keep us together
but too much maybes eventually surface and kill you off

I'm holding you tight to me as long as I can
no matter which ending is going to come
but have you ever wondered which sense all these things make to you
it's time to uncover our eyes

strange, it's how we're used to live it
it's like no sense whatsoever
sure it's real love
it's all we wanna hear
merry Christmas my love
it's all we wanna hear again
stripping away all our gifts while our feelings are getting this much huge

we're given time to reach the very dead end
but all the time in the world won't change it all
and I think that we can't see whether things are black or white anymore
but it's time to uncover our eyes

I'll keep it alive here and stand aside from you
no matter which ending is going to come
Track Name: Nicosia (You Can't Rule My Place)
who d'you think you are to say who I am?
screwing all I've said and knowing nothing
it’s not about love nor sex nor anything I live
that’s what you listen but not what you want
next time you say you’re gonna help me to figure it out
next time, next time, it’s always next time

and now I see everything disappearing
I’m on my way but I’m not coming home
it’s always when the other me tries to stand out
oh how I wish it all came back
it’s exactly when good and evil mix and indeed
that’s how everything seems to come out of blue
so I cry out from this side of my wall again
cos I’m split in two just like Nicosia

you can’t rule my place, that’s not a fairytale and
you gotta be kidding cos it’s not so being human
you can’t rule my place, it’s mine only I belong
I can let you come in but I dare you to live in
you can’t rule my place unless the wall falls apart
but I do know everything bleeds and still can’t find a cure
you can’t rule my place even if I let you do
and what if I would? sweet dreams to my soul

it’s mine, it’s mine, it overcomes again
it’s mine, it’s mine, the downfall is beginning

caught while I'm standing out even when I'm about to go
please won't you leave me now
I'm begging all the angels by my side
sleeping while I'm prisoner of everything I live for
don't you even try to save me
cos the given-up part of me is surfacing over the years
it's killing me within and there's no medicine
you can't rule my place can't you see?
I'll always drink my potion, lost into the ocean
you can't rule my place like I do
and it's you
but you go ahead without me
I'll be there before the sunrise

through the cracks
I see the light
though
Track Name: Wrong God
can you hear me? well it seems you can't
getting tired cos everything seems to go against me now
I'm not so pure indeed but I don't deserve hell (do I?)
either way I won't spend my time going up and reaching the sky
asking god “what's the matter?” (I won't)
think he should come down
his messengers keep speaking on his behalf

my life is full of things I'm not so proud of
because of it they will drag me down
on and on confusion still lives in me
that's gonna be the only thing that'll fill me

don't y'all try to seek me
in your lies I won't stay
because the one they're praying to now is a wrong god

what's the point of it? I keep asking
but you don't hear me
that's an evidence
can you disagree me?
tell me how I might talk to you
because I do want to
I can't figure if I don't know
and ask myself and wonder too
can't you see the hell I'm in? well well that's real
so if I deserve all of this why am I still alive?

call off your messengers I don't believe 'em
what is supposed to be your real word is
nothing but something only they keep telling
I do am fed up with what looks like fantasy

where is your voice?
let me hear it
I no longer can
live this
Track Name: The Landlord
love is a load of things we can't hide
obscenity fills up our bodies completely
an open wound won't be medicated
by what entwines disinfectant and consciousness
that's because anything coming from you
breathes my other me into life

you told me a load of bollocks, off you go!
cos you are the dead end of my life, off you go!
off you go!

my house burns out and ashes are much taller
I can't hide
you'll be out of place and I'll be your landlord
think about a way to pay me off
just in case you'll stop cold asking for truce
I'll be playing dead in front of you
one's happiness depends more on what he knows
than on what he feels
and I don't feel you at all

she craves my mind which isn't for her
she begs for me down on her knees

you told me a load of bollocks, off you go!
cos you are the dead end of my life, here you come
cos no one will ever tear a strip off me, and surely not you
cos you are the dead end of my life, off you go!
off you go!
Track Name: The Ties That Bind
the love that you know is just in your thoughts
and no one is such wasted like being in a row
partners along with you before you got through
shameless and careless you walk the way they crawled

I know that it makes you happy and confident
I mean to say you'll get rid of the ties that bind

I ain't someone you can trust
it's always been like this
secretly I've always been the one who tried to make it tear apart
cos I've never believed it
it was too much I can sustain
no wonder all the hate that comes back it's a part of me by now
I'm used to it

the love that I know is just in my thoughts
and no one can ever judge me neither do I
this tie suffocates me so much more than it breaks me
still shameless and careless I'm feeling like a fool

can't you see this world around me is killing me
and I won't be able to break these chains
Track Name: Where Hedges Never Grow
in each of our deepest feelings we all surrender to ourselves
but in front of persons
words as only witness
demigods, we all are
to those who are strangers to us
never we tell 'em the truth
dreams either black or white
and places where hedges never grow at all
deep inside we wish for them to be in our past
truth is relative
we don't need it to look like myths
and be from those places

and it feels right, it feels sights
like it was the place we've grown up in
it feels sights, it feels right
but what I feel for you
now it's indifference

constance in our words is the only thing we don't loose
how can one god do that?
how can one be god?
but truth always comes out soon or later
are we able to manage lies for hundred years?
reasons for downfalls are always simple
we lay on the bottom pretending the landscape
to be the heaven with all those cants
instead of flames
realise we're in the hell

(we're burning)

four years gone
is that enough?
and my world has come undone
still necessary to talk of what has gone wrong?
still lies come out from your mouth
I bet you will never give up
but I know you and you know me
what else to say?
take me elsewhere
Track Name: Remota
ingannevole è l'istinto più di ogni altra cosa
mentre si nasconde in fretta dietro l'asse del tuo cuore
i luoghi bui del cielo diventan chiari e limpidi
e tutto si trasforma in fretta nel paradiso senza errore

gioca pure anche tu alla favola perfetta
ma il vento cambia spesso e con esso anche il silenzio
il fiume scorre rapido, lisergica visione che lascia posto alla realtà
niente più colori
ricordati che i tuoi timori erano miei
quando due posti eran nostri nella città degli dei
troni colori suoni nuovi ori e stupori
e questo è andato via, da qualche parte
chissà se è ancora lì fuori

il vento copre il cielo, naufragi alla deriva
io torno nella grande città remota nel deserto
in quella vola alta Lucy con i diamanti
di spalle vai verso il fuoco
sentirai l'eco del mio vuoto
Track Name: Don't Fall In Love
I cannot sustain this at all, can you?
even so far away we're in this together, ain't we?
our lives are not entwined, ain't they?
so what's the point of doing that?
cos I can't see

cos I see you little by little into this dream of yours
and I'm worried cos it's pretty early to fall in love

I wish everything to go the way we agreed at first
please don't mess it up as it always goes
be focused
and stay apart, use your mind
cos this is not love
don't you dare to mean it this way
you're not doing that, huh?

cos I see you little by little into this dream of yours
and I'm worried cos it's pretty early to fall in love

don't fall in love
Track Name: Blood On The Carpet
cut my arms off, I won't do wrong again
and it ain't an understatement
my head is sick and my stomach is bleeding
I'm stripping my skin off
get off your clothes cos you're staying here
overnight
watch me as I die then laugh over my grave
pull your skirt on and just walk away

I still can recall your whispers in my ear
and my name called out
your pleas, your screams, your suffocated words
when we are biting each other in bed
right in the moment when everything ends
the snow starts to fall down
and you can kill me but please don't hurt me

nothing remains
no one prays
not the good nor the bad it's not the same
eyes cloud over,
over your breath
it's hovering between life and death

and nothing ever change
even miles and miles away

if I were you I'd pull the trigger
forget remorse and solitude
there’ll be blood on the carpet but won't you mind to ignore
plant a bomb within me and just walk away

I never sleep when you sleep
Track Name: In Daybreaks
he who wills the end wills also the means
he who will no longer live will also end with control
the bitter end, the dead end
he who'll find the distinction
will banish pain from his mind
but that will not be me

what is this deaf sound that covers my daybreak?
temptations have become so stronger in my head
a voice repeating, it is teasing
cos all got so flimsy, as well as dirty
you won't wave goodbye, it has come the time
and no one will cry, so see you on the other side

blessed is he who expects nothing
for he shall never be disappointed
I have never been enough to
my wills and my skills
I have started and I will end this
that's it
just forget about me
and the world won't care at all
cos in daybreaks someone's always missing
in daybreaks someone's always missing
in daybreaks someone's always missing
in daybreaks someone's always missing
here